#I see people shipping them and I’m like what is wrong with you.
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supercalime · 10 hours ago
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A goodbye post I guess?
Hey yall, i wanted to write something about all of this as this may be the last time I talk about this show. Apologies in advance, this will be long and all over the place cause im using this little essay to get it off my chest and help me calm down my anxiety. Strap in, this will be a doozy.
First off, no matter how sad and disappointed we are, let’s please not stoop down to the level of those fans when it comes to voicing our issues with this situation. Please, let’s not harass, call people names, send them threats, etc. we can voice our opinions in an adult way, and although it fucking hurts and it makes us want to shout from the rooftops and call Murphy, Minear and Stark every name in the sun, we need to be grown ups and come out on top of it.
That being said, I want to first acknowledge how fun and cool yall are. We endured A LOT of shit since april and all that bullshit didn’t stop you from keeping the positivity going. I applaud you all for that. It has been hard. I came in contact and became friends with some really nice people here and I wouldn’t change it for the world. I loved being a part of this fandom and it physically hurts me that this feels like it was all for nothing.
Even though I feel like a fool as well, I hate to see how you are all so sad with this. This wasn’t our fault. We were not naive for believing that this storyline could’ve been great. Don’t blame yourself for being taken advantage of. Because that’s what they did. They saw the opportunity to profit from a community and took it. They are the ones in the wrong. They used us for brownie points and then tossed us away like trash the second they got what they wanted. It’s on them.
What I’m about to say now will sound hypocritical as I’m writing this at 2am while trying to cope with an anxiety attack caused by this very show, but what we can take away from this is that unfortunately, we can’t rely on tv shows for happiness. Yes, that’s a bitter pill to swallow, specially in this political climate as we were hoping for some sort of escape from the horrors of the elections. What i took away from this is that I need to (for lack of a better word) touch grass. I need hobbies, I need friends. All things that I’ve been lacking because fandom stuff is easier. I need to find stuff that makes me happy that doesn’t depend on outside factors. But also I want to make sure that if a show is all you have, that’s okay and is even more okay to feel betrayed. I was an absolute mess a few years ago when a show I adored stabbed their fans in the back, but it gets better. You still get angry remembering you were done dirty but I promise that the memories that stick are the positive ones.
I don’t wanna go on a deleting spree but I also don’t want to be reminded of this hurtful moment as the wound is still fresh, so I’m deciding to reevaluate some things offline, like I did with previous fandoms, and come back when I’m ready. I don’t think I’ll leave tumblr or never watch/talk about 911 again but I need some time and space from it so I can feel better. I don’t want to doom scroll through the tags like I did tonight. What Ryan Murphy, Tim Minear and Oliver Stark did to us was awful, but the best thing I can do is not let these three men influence my mental health. I won’t let a tv show ruin me because it’s not my fault. It’s not our fault to believe that there were half decent people in the entertainment industry that cares about the portrayal of queer individuals. They will have to sleep at night with that knowledge and deal with the consequences from the BoBs. And if these guys decide to humor the BoBs that’s their funeral. It would further show they never cared about representation and just wanted to save face after making so many people miserable for simply enjoying a canon ship. I hope they can see the consequences because I’m not even the target here. I’m hurt for all the queer men that saw themselves in buck and tommy, that even messaged the actors thanking them for their honest portrayal.
In conclusion, here’s my goodbye (for now).
Thank you so much bucktommy nation!
Yall are the best,
Love, Lety 🖤
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froody · 9 months ago
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I am so so so so so so glad Audrey/Cooper was not endgame. I hate the leftover tension. I despise John Justice Wheeler and think Audrey should have gotten up to more snooping and meddling rather than have a romantic plot line but thank you God that Kyle MacLachlan and Laura Flynn Boyle put a stop to the AudreyCoop line.
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seagreenstardust · 4 months ago
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Anyone still calling late game Katsuki an abuser in 2024 is just not paying attention. Full stop.
#bkdk#bakudeku#every time I see an anti post they try to define bkdk shippers as just masking their hate of Izuku#or as inappropriately labeling them as childhood friends and that being the basis of the whole ship#or as of acting on the hand hold scene LIKE KATSUKI DID FOR ELEVEN PLUS YEARS IN CANON without realizing that it went sour that first time#or as abuse apologists#they like to whittle katsuki down to the black and white bully even now#in 2024#after everything he’s done#all the growing#they like to whittle Izuku down to a helpless child who can’t find it in himself to stand up for himself#even though canon Izuku not only tolerates Katsuki’s moods#he appreciates him and understands him#and finds joy in being around him#literally I get it if you see them as platonic only#that’s so super chill and an excellent dynamic#but people throwing hate at bkdk shippers only ever out themselves as not understanding or comprehending or even knowing the source material#at all#on the surface Katsuki yells at izuku for literally nothing and it definitely rubs you the wrong way if you are only paying surface level#attention#but after dvk pt 2 he literally only yells because it’s familiar#it’s easier to respond that way than to cope with the guilt that’s eating him alive whenever he sees how happy Izuku is just to be around h#he’s flustered#he’s got a crush#but doesn’t have the emotional intelligence to understand what it is or how to deal yet#Katsuki Bakugo is a flawed character who puts in the work to change and if you’re not acknowledging that you are not paying attention#anyway#lol the post a while ago that said ‘if you ship bkdk just admit you hate Izuku and move on’??????#lol I love him so much AND I ship bkdk because canon tells me that’s what he wants#at least I’m paying attention enough not to think he has to be babified
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cable-salamdr · 3 months ago
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Can’t wait for Roby to show up only for him to be
A. A very minor role who gets like three voice lines total
Or
B. Far older than we thought and thus make everyone who was making fanart of him and Wyldfyre as a pair mildly scrambling (because of the whole. “Wyldfyre gets a bf” and people assuming that will be Roby)
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lunarsolar1 · 3 months ago
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This isn’t what my blog is about and I usually try to avoid making post about things not related to the tv show fandom I’m in but someone needed to call this people out because going to this tag and seeing war everywhere is so tiring and exhausting so imma make this post and HOPEFULLY PEOPLE WILL READ AND LISTEN!!!!!!!!
Buddie shippers needs to seriously CALM DOWN:) and back off!!!! (This also applies to BUCKTOMMY shippers)
Going to the others tag just to HARASS and bully people over FICTIONAL characters is so ridiculous and stupid and people need to stop. It’s a TV SHOW!!!! YOU aren’t the ones writing this, the writes are and they’ll know how they want to finish THEIR story because that’s THEIR characters!!!! Not yours!!!!! People (both sides) need to stop harassing one another and just stay in your tag and enjoy the ship and the characters. There’s no need for hatred or war, especially since in the tv show all 3 are FRIENDS (so fighting about it is so???!!!) just stop. Y’all acting like babies, get some manners and learn how to respect each other preferences and continue enjoying yall ships in PEACE!
And please leave the actors alone as well, they’re just actors they cannot decide what they’ll do next seasons. There’s literally no reason to harass and bully people over people that doesn’t exist. Just enjoy the SHOW and enjoy the SHIP and LEAVE PEOPLE ALONE!!!!!!! And stop using the incorrect tag please, I know some yall are doing it on purpose but please stop that is so annoying. (And I know yall KNOW how that feels like so stop!)
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edandstede · 1 year ago
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“stizzy” and “edizzy” this “steddyhands polycule” that i’m being violently sick on my shoes actually
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thefloatingwriter · 1 year ago
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this fandom scares me :)
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feartheoldblog · 2 years ago
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in the nicest way possible i don’t understand why people keep bringing up the g*hrman/m*ria discourse……… there is literally no point because you cannot realistically change their opinion, you’re wasting your time
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heaartshaped · 2 years ago
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PARAGON 😭😭😭😭😭😭 no
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yournameoverandover · 2 months ago
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.
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cryptvokeeper · 8 months ago
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at least for vaspider it looks like the main accusation is that they’re a Zionist which doesn’t seem even remotely true from searching their blog. They’re a Jewish person saying that the atrocities currently happening in Gaza don’t excuse being antisemitic to jewish people in the rest of the world
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when I stop reading the post
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gb-patch · 3 months ago
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GB Patch Games: Response About Sensitivity Reader
[Some of you might not have heard of this happening, but I wanted to address it across the board]
Hey everyone,
I want to make a post about the screenshots of comments from one of our sensitivity readers. The situation is that neither me or Rose want people to feel uncomfortable with Our Life: Now & Forever, but Rose hasn’t done anything terribly wrong and isn’t going to be punished.
The comment about OL MCs wasn’t meant to be genuine hatred towards all male players/MCs of OL. Rose wrote a reply about it-
"Hi everyone! This is Rose, I want to address the male MC comment since it was taken wildly out of context and without the lengthy discussion that was after it. I don't hate male MCs, in fact far from it, male MCs are integral to the story in OL:NF as female and trans MCs are. I think the relationship they could potentially have with Qiu could be a great asset in my opinion as they figure out their gender alongside the MC. The discussion itself was about how I noticed players were sticking to heteronormative norms by shipping Tamarack with a man purely out of societal norms than it was genuine thought into the characters and how I personally wished there was more sapphic relationships with Tamarack or just Tamarack with trans characters as a sapphic trans person myself. I didn't mean to offend anyone by it as no one but my friends who understood what I legitimately meant behind my message and it definitely wasn't meant to be seen seriously. I am sorry regardless to anyone I have offended and I love your male MCs regardless."
And most of the comments were about me. I’ve seen screenshots of the full conversations and they’re not as harsh as the cropped snippets made them out to be. It was longer discussions about not including Derek in any base game Moments for no good reason and not having any plus-sized love interests in OL1 because I was afraid players wouldn’t accept it. That’s not a lie, it’s what I decided for the game I created, and it is ridiculous of me. I’m the one who should be feeling embarrassed over how OL1 will forever be that way, not the people who remember that I did that. I’m not perfect and Rose actually cares more about the players than making me feel like I am flawless.
I also don’t want to tone police an employee venting about their boss in private, on their own time. Both the OL games deal with personal, important topics. This is sensitive work, and it can bring up frustrations. Sometimes people do use harsh words among friends, but they wouldn’t ever say it to a person seriously and directly.
I understand if you wouldn’t want to see anyone speak badly of a dev you like, but I promise it’s not a point of contention between me and Rose. I don’t feel mistreated in anyway. Rose genuinely cares about the Our Life series, and that’s why they get fed up with me over certain parts of the game.
Rose has never been unkind or unreasonable to me when working on the project, and their advice is detailed and well-explained. They do care about the game and want it to avoid having content that upsets people because of my own ignorance/shortcomings.
This being shared publicly from a private server is targeting Rose and seems to be a continuation of things that have happened before this. I don’t want this to continue happening. If you do still have concerns over the one comment about the community, you can let me know. But again, I don’t want people being mistrustful of Rose on my behalf for comments about me in conversations with missing context.
Do not send angry messages to Rose about any of this. We’ll do our best so that OL2 will be better than I was before. Thank you to everyone who reads this and participates in the community!
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afterglowsainz · 19 days ago
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the girl is mine | charles leclerc, alexandra saint mleux
pairing: charles leclerc x actress!reader x alexandra saint mleux
summary: when your new movie comes out, your boyfriend and girlfriend get jealous of fans shipping you with your costar, even though your relationship is still a secret to the public
fc: rachel zegler
request: here and here
a/n: and he wins in austinnnn! (with alex because apparently now i cannot write about charles without also writing about alex)
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liked by alexandrasaintmleux, oliviarodrigo and others
yourusername only a few days left until you get to see this incredible story on the big screen 👀🐍
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username can’t wait!
username so excited for this movie🙏🏽
username you’re exactly the way i imagine lucy gray would look like i’m so happy
username gotta love this era of y/n
username pretty girls love lucy gray baird! (liked by yourusername)
username mesmerized by the first picture alone
username ohhh the 12 year old girl in me who hiperfixated on the hunger games can’t wait for this 😩
alexandrasaintmleux’s instagram stories
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[caption 1: 👀🐍] [caption 2: ❤️]
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liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc and others
voguemagazine y/n y/l/n and tom blyth stunned in the red carpet premiere of the hunger games: the ballad of songbirds & snakes
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username is everyone thinking what i’m thinking…
username nahhh i ship them so bad
username they have so much chemistry i love them
username so cute 🥰
username new parents unlocked
username they’re so hot
username cause how can you look at that second picture and not immediately ship them?
username i don’t care if i sound delusional but they make a really good couple
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liked by tomblyth, francisca.cgomes and others
yourusername a little behind the scenes and people i can’t get enough of! ✨🐍💗
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username i’m shipping even harder alright
username “people i can’t get enough of” please just confirm the rumors 😭
username no but that face card is insaaaane
username the movie was amazing!
tomblyth work it!
yourusername earn it!
username ahhh the dating confirmation when
username no but imagine if they were actually together how iconic would that be
username they look so cute together i’m- 🥺
alexandrasaintmleux 💚
yourusername 💗
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liked by yourusername, alexandrasaintmleux and others
charles_leclerc congratulations, my lucy gray, you’re the most talented person i know 💚 nous t'aimons avec notre âme, mon coeur <3 (we love you with our soul, my love)
tagged yourusername, alexandrasaintmleux
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username wait what
username rue… when was this
username no way they are dating THE y/n y/l/n
username i really expected anything but this 😭
username no but wait … they look good 👀
username what do you do when the hottest people you know reveal they’re dating each other on a random tuesday afternoon?
username they really saw the shipping with tom and said not on my watch
username i’m still processing this
yourusername love you 🥺🥺🥺
yourusername although i know the real reason you’re posting this 😑 but i’ll let it slide cause i like you
charles_leclerc nothing wrong with wanting to show off my girlfriend 😅
alexandrasaintmleux our*
alexandrasaintmleux i love you y/n you’re the most talented and the prettiest and kindest and ours🥰🥰🥰
yourusername love you too alex 😭
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luckybunny001 · 22 days ago
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“It only took a moment…”
(Mouthwashing Daisuke x Mechanic! Reader)
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The crew had been stranded in space for what felt like an eternity—food supplies dwindling, hope fading.
Curly, their captain, lay immobile in the medical bay, a constant reminder of their dire circumstances.
Jimmy, the co-captain, ruled with an iron fist, belittling everyone and taking advantage of Curly’s condition.
Anya, the ship’s nurse, fluttered nervously around them, her eyes darting whenever Jimmy came near.
Swansea, the tough-as-nails mechanic, had taken Daisuke under his wing but seemed to grow increasingly frustrated with him.
“Just pull yourself together, Daisuke,” he would say, his gruff voice echoing in Daisuke’s mind.
But now, sitting on the floor, Daisuke felt anything but together. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out the swirling thoughts that accompanied his tipsy state.
Suddenly, he heard footsteps approaching.
Panic gripped him, and he quickly wiped at his eyes, hoping to hide the evidence of his inebriation. But as he opened his eyes,
Reader appeared in the dim light, her silhouette framed by the flickering overhead. She looked down at him, concern etching her features.
“Daisuke?” she said softly, kneeling beside him. “What’s wrong? You look… off.”
He forced a smile, trying to mask his feelings. “I’m fine! Just… taking a little break, you know?” His voice was unsteady, betraying the bravado he was trying to project.
Reader frowned, her brow creasing with worry. “You don’t look fine. Are you sure you’re okay?”
He felt the walls closing in around him, the weight of the ship’s uncertainty pressing down on his chest. “Really, I’m—” But before he could finish, the dam broke. Tears, pooling at the corner of his eyes as he quickly squeezed them shut to prevent them to fall but to no avail as he felt the sting grow more as the tears escaped his eyes.
Reader’s expression shifted from concern to immediate empathy. She quickly wrapped her arms around him, pulling him close. “Hey, hey, it’s okay. You’re safe. Just breathe.”
Daisuke buried his face in her shoulder, the warmth of her body grounding him as he let the tears flow freely. He felt embarrassed and vulnerable, but there was something about Reader’s presence that made it feel safe to let it all out.
The warmth of her concern was like a beacon in the darkness that surrounded him, and suddenly, the weight of everything crashed down. “I… I’m sorry, Reader,” he choked out, his voice cracking. “I just… I feel like such a loser. I can’t do anything right.”
“Daisuke, you’re not a loser,” Reader said firmly, rubbing his back in soothing circles. “You’re one of the most optimistic people I know. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed. We’re all struggling right now.”
“I thought I could handle it,” he continued, his voice shaking. “I thought I could be helpful, but all I’ve done is mess things up. I can’t even—” He choked on his words, the shame washing over him like a tidal wave. “I drank mouthwash! I can’t even do that right.”
Reader pulled back slightly to look him in the eye, her gaze steady and unyielding. “Listen to me. You’re not defined by this moment. None of us are. We’re in a tough spot, and it’s okay to not be okay. You’re trying, and that counts for something. You bring light to this ship, Daisuke. You really do.”
He sniffled, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. “But Curly… and Jimmy… and Swansea… they all think I’m just a burden.”
“Curly is in a bad place, and Jimmy… well, he’s just Jimmy,” she said, her voice filled with a mix of frustration and sympathy. “And Swansea? He’s tough because he cares. He sees potential in you, but it’s hard for him to show it right now. You’re not a burden. You’re part of this crew, just like the rest of us.”
The mention of Curly brought a fresh wave of pain to Daisuke’s heart. The captain had been a beacon of kindness, now reduced to a shadow of his former self. “I just wish things were different,” he murmured as Daisuke took a shaky breath, absorbing her words. “But what if we don’t make it? What if we run out of food and… and…”
Reader’s eyes softened, and she cupped his face in her hands, forcing him to meet her gaze. “We will make it.” Reader said, squeezing his shoulder reassuringly. “But crying won’t help. We need to be strong for each other, especially now.”
Daisuke leaned against her, the warmth of her body grounding him in a way he desperately needed. “How do you stay so strong?” he asked, his voice barely a whisper.
“It’s not easy,” she admitted. “But I remember why I’m here. I think about the people I care about — like you, Daisuke. You make it worth it. And I know you can be strong too.”
He swallowed hard, her words wrapping around him like a comforting blanket. “I want to be strong. For you. For the crew.”
“Then let’s do it together,” she said, her eyes shining with determination. “We’ll figure this out. One day at a time.”
As the tension began to ease, Daisuke felt the crushing weight of despair lift, if only slightly. “Thanks, Reader. You always know what to say.”
“Just don’t bottle it up next time, okay?” she said, a small smile playing on her lips. “You can always talk to me. I’m here for you.”
Daisuke nodded, a sense of relief washing over him. “I will. I promise.”
Before he could think twice, he leaned in and hugged her tightly, grateful for her support. She hesitated, then wrapped her arms around him, holding him close.
In that moment, surrounded by the uncertainty of space and the weight of their situation, Daisuke felt a sense of belonging that had eluded him for so long.
Maybe it was with her… he didn’t know.
They were lost, yes, but together, they could navigate the abyss.
As the ship drifted silently through the cosmos, two hearts found solace in each other. And for the first time in a long while, Daisuke believed that perhaps, just perhaps, there was a way forward.
Unfortunately… that wasn’t possible for one of them at least….
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starlazergazer · 3 months ago
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Separated
Pairing: Anakin x Reader
Request: You could do a story where the reader and Anakin had something, but the order tried everything to separate them, and so Anakin wasn't there when she ended up dying. That will be the trigger for him to start doubting the order, and hating them, but it turns out that a reader from another universe, who is exactly the same as his, just shows up.
Warning: Angst! Almost character death, lots of swearing tbh my bad
Word Count: 7k
A/N: Changed the request just a bit hope that’s okay but obsessed with the overall premise! I’m thinking she needs a part 2 but let me know what y’all think!
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There was something uniquely terrifying about a silent Anakin Skywalker.
Everyone knew the jedi had a temper, it wasn’t something he was necessarily subtle about, there were few who had been at one time or another on the other end of it, you included.
But Anakin’s temper always exposed itself in the same way. Yelling, pacing, ranting. There were a number of times you had sat down before him waiting for him to get his lecture out of the way, letting him explode like a volcano before being able to actually have a constructive conversation with him.
You honestly couldn’t think of the last time you had seen him as he was now. Quiet, still, contemplative.
Admittedly there was a part of you that wanted to poke the bear, to say something that you knew would make him explode, force him back into charted territory so you knew how to deal with the fallout.
“I just don’t see the big deal”
Still nothing, a harsh glare boring down on you, arms crossed tightly over his chest, jaw clenched so harshly you could see the muscle through his skin, not a word.
“You do stuff like that all the time”
Just the steady rise and fall of his chest as he took measured, deep breaths.
You were returning home a hero, the entire hanger had cheered for you the moment you touched down, a hoard of people circling you with congratulatory hugs the second your foot touched solid ground, and still somehow Anakin had the power to make you feel like you’d failed.
This was supposed to be your moment and still somehow Anakin controlled the temperature in the room.
“I told you to turn back”
You’d stopped expecting him to speak, so thrown off by the sudden change you physically jumped at the sound of his voice, at how unexpectedly quiet it was.
“That was the wrong call and you know it”
Anakin took a deep breath at your response, his gaze cutting suddenly to the left, a moment passing as he collected himself before responding, that act alone almost making you faulter.
“If it was the wrong call I wouldn’t have made it. I told you to turn back”
“And you aren’t my reporting officer”
“This isn’t a game Y/N!”
The sudden explosion from the man would have surprised you if you hadn’t been unconsciously waiting for it, coiled like a spring waiting for Anakin to snap, waiting for him to yell, a weird weight lifting off your chest as you returned to normalcy.
“I know this isn’t a game do you?” You shot back quickly, just as loudly “He had coordinates, locations of nearly every battalion in the galaxy, information like that isn’t simply a pawn you can choose to trade away”
“Neither are you”
The response came too quickly, too quietly, too seriously for you to fully comprehend the words as he said them, your body physically recoiling at the sudden drop in temperature.
“I was fine”
“You were within firing range” he argued back, his hands coming down to rest on his hips as he glared at you “an entire separatist fleet was on the other side of that moon waiting for him to drag whatever republic ships he could towards them so they could shoot it down and you fell right into that trap”
“I didn’t have a choice”
“You had multiple” he shut you down without ever raising his voice, a single glare enough to silence you “listening to me for one of them”
“And if you had been in my shoes” you prompted “if you had been close enough to chase him would you have simply let him get away?”
“I would have-“ you scoffed before he could get the words out, seeing exactly where he was going before he got there.
“don’t lie to me Anakin Skywalker you treat risking your life as if it were a paying job”
You watched his jaw tick at your response, his words dying on his lips before he changed routs “I told you to turn back”
You let a humorless laugh bubble out of you, a frustrated hand raking across your face as you shook your head “I can’t believe you’re being so blatantly hypocritical right now”
“It’s different” his words came out so quick he seemed almost surprised to hear them himself.
“How?” you demanded more than asked, silently daring him to give you a legitimate answer you weren’t sure he could supply.
“I can’t-“ he cut himself off before he could finish, a huff escaping before he took a deep breath and continued “I need you to listen to me. When I tell you what to do I need you to listen to me”
“Even if-“
“yes” he cut you off before you could get your question off “whatever context, whatever quantifiers I don’t care. Out there I need you to listen to me”
Again his tone was throwing you for a loop. Gone was the anger, the frustration, the ire. Now he seemed to be almost begging, pleading with you to listen to him, to agree, to promise something like today wouldn’t happen again.
But you had made the right call. That was what was sticking with you. You know what you did was risky, hell you could get behind even calling it a little reckless, but objectively it was the right call. You were talking about locations of every troop of clones in the republic in the hands of the separatist’s how could he not see that this was worth anything, that taking down this spy was worth everything.
“Ani what-“
“There you two are” a new voice interrupted you, the sudden appearance of Obi-wan pulling you back to the present moment, reminding you that you and Anakin were in the jedi temple, that you had just come back from a mission, that you still had duties to uphold.
“Master Kenobi” you quickly greeted the man with a small bow, watching the man you had practically grown up under break out into a proud grin as he clapped you on the shoulder.
“That was a great shot Y/N” he praised you shaking you softly “you saved the Republic today I hope you know that”
And though you could feel your chest warm with the praise you couldn’t help but feel a small twinge because of it, not missing Anakin’s small scoff at Obi-wan’s words.
Anakin was your best friend, a man you grew up beside as a padawan, a man you had been practice dueling since you could hold a saber, and you had just pulled off a major victory for the Republic. Was it really too much to ask that your friend take just a second to be proud of you.
“Thank you master” you responded warmly nonetheless nodding at him “believe me when I say it wasn’t easy”
The older man laughed warmly at your words, dropping his hand from your shoulder as he did “that I don’t doubt but believe me when I say we are all glad your maneuver paid off, what you pulled was risky”
You shot a guilty glance at Anakin only to see the man casting his gaze at the floor, arms snaked back around his chest physically distancing himself from the two of you in this moment.
“Anyways what I came here to say is that the council is looking for the two of you” Obi-wan continued on, either choosing to ignore or missing the tension hanging in the air between you and Anakin “you need to debrief before you’re free for the evening.”
“Of course master” you answered for the two of you “we will be right there”
Obi-wan gave you an appreciative nod before taking his leave, casting a questioning glance at his former padawan before exiting the room, casting you and Anakin in a thick silence you were tentative to break.
“Ani-“ you tried but he cut you off.
“Look we’ll talk later” he muttered over his shoulder, already making his way out of the room “we shouldn’t keep them waiting”
-
You could never feel comfortable in the jedi council room, something you were sure was done by design as you and Anakin were forced into the middle of the room, made the literal center of attention.
Even as you knew you were here to receive praise for your actions you couldn’t help but shrink beneath Mace Windu’s gaze.
“-you exemplified what it means to be a jedi knight perfectly today jedi Y/L/N” Master Windu droned on, his voice thankfully lacking the usual edge it had when addressing you with Anakin in the room “we thank you for your actions today”
“I was just doing my job” you responded humbly as you were expected to with a respectful nod “but I am glad to have been of help”
“Of great help you were” Master Kloon chimed in pulling your attention to him as he spoke “the republic owes you a great debt today”
You smiled politely at Mater Kloon, gaze again being drawn across the room as Master Fisto picked up where Kloon left off, a part of you wondering if they did this on purpose to disorient you “we do however have one question regarding this situation. Jedi Skywalker you tried to order Jedi Y/L/N back”
“I did” Anakin’s response was quick with an edge to his voice that had you mentally sighing, you weren’t eager to witness Anakin go up against the council today. “The spy’s ship had reached firing range of the rest of the battalion anyone who followed him was likely to be shot before they could reach”
“Called her back before she reached firing range you did” Master Yoda spoke this time, eyes planted solely on Anakin as he spoke
“She was far back from the spy’s ship, by the time she reached him they would both be within firing range” Anakin countered through gritted teeth, you watched him ball his fists at his sides from the corner of your eye.
“That ultimately however proved not to be the case as she was able to take down the spy without any harm coming to her own fighter” Mace Windu spoke carefully, clearly organizing a path down which he planned to steer this conversation.
A tense silence passed for a moment, a staring contest passing between the Jedi master and the general before Anakin spoke “a miscalculation on my part then”
“It’s a good thing she ignored your miscalculation then” Master Windu offered dryly “we do however have access to the flight com logs. Would you like to explain jedi Skywalker why you ordered jedi Y/L/N not once but five times to turn back”
“Her pursuing as she did was a risk I wasn’t willing to make at the time master”
“Even when aware of the information that ship contained” Master Windu prompted with a raised brow “every troop location of the Republics army. Are you saying you weren’t wiling to risk the life of one jedi for the fate of this war Jedi Skywalker?”
“I don’t trade in lives Master” Anakin challenged back quickly.
“One life versus the lives of billions across the galaxy the math should be easy Jedi”
“we’re here to be Jedi knights not martyrs”
“And it is your duty as jedi knights to do whatever it takes to protect the republic as Jedi Y/L/N did”
“And if she had failed? If the inevitable had happened and she was fired upon the second she came within distance? What good would a dead Jedi knight have done anyone” Anakin was seething at this point, the familiar white hot anger you had expected to be directed at you earlier finally making its appearance.
“We can stop pretending this is about just any Jedi Knight” Mace Windu’s words had Anakin physically recoiling, effectively throwing him off course having the two of you furrowing your brows “there is a reason the jedi code forbids attachments”
“Master we haven’t formed an attachment” you took this as your chance to chime in, keeping your voice light trying to dispel any lingering tension in the air.
Master Windu’s eyes took a second too long to break from Anakin’s to meet yours, a knowing silence permeating the air as if he meant to let your comment hang in it “what happened today, any possibility of letting that spy go, cannot happen again”
You furrowed your brow at his vague response, eyes snapping back to master Yoda as he spoke up.
“not a punishment this is” he chimed in softly, looking directly at you as he did so “remember that you must”
Your eyes snapped back to Master Windu “master what are you saying?”
Mace Windu’s eyes bounced back and forth between you and Anakin for a moment before landing on the latter, another small silence stretching before he spoke “Jedi Skywalker and Y/L/N going forward are forbidden from going on missions together”
A stunned silence fell over you and Anakin, your eyes casting immediately to him only to see his disbelieving gaze locked on Mace Windu “Master you can’t-“ gone was all edge in Anakin’s tone, an almost pleading one taking its place as he tried to talk.
“The council’s decision on this is final” Master Windu cut Anakin off with a single raised hand.
“but-“
“You are dismissed jedi” The doors to the council room opened behind you before Anakin could get out any more than a word. Master Windu leaving no room for either of you to plead your case.
Numbly you left the room with Anakin in tow, your brain still struggling to wrap itself around what had just occurred as you entered the hallway and stopped against the wall, Anakin not missing a beat as he started to pace back and forth in front of you.
“You have to tell me where you’re going next I’ll see if I can at least be close” he was already talking a mile a minute, almost mumbling as if talking to himself rather than you.
“I can’t even remember the last mission I did without you” you mused quietly.
“Under no circumstances can you go alone either take Obi-wan or I’ll give you Rex”
“I can’t believe the council thinks we need to be separated”
“And call me every day even if it’s just to check in”
“Ani you know I can handle myself right” Your sudden direct address of him brought Anakin’s attention back to you, his pacing halting as his gaze snapped up to meet yours.
“After today?” He laughed bitterly in response.
“I came back today” you countered defensively, at this point beyond tired of this same argument “not a scratch on my ship I am alive and well”
“And you almost weren’t” finally Anakin exploded on you, vein popping in his neck as he yelled, a frustrated hand tangling itself in his hair as his pacing picked up once again “you got lucky. That’s it. What you did was dangerous, it was stupid, it was risky, and it only paid off because you got lucky and I feel like I’m going insane because how can no one see that? You are only here right now because you got lucky and there is no guarantee on that a second time”
“Or I’m a good pilot” you shot back angrily “I’m a good pilot and a good jedi who trusted her instincts and accomplished the goal. Is it really that hard for you to trust in my ability?”
Anakin physically deflated at your words, the full meaning of his own hitting him for the first time as he crumpled slightly “Y/N I didn’t mean-”
“No that’s just what you said” you cut him off “I get it you think I can’t handle myself and shouldn’t be trusted. I’m not sure why you’d want to be sent out on missions with me anyways”
“Y/N please” Anakin begged softly but you had had enough, cutting him off with a shake of your head and a sigh.
“No Ani I’m done with whatever is happening right now. It’s been a long day and I’m just-“ You cut yourself off with a deep sigh, taking a second to take a deep breath before turning on your heel leaving Anakin behind as you made your way back to your room, calling softly over your shoulder “I’m done”
-
You knew who was behind your door before he had even knocked. Could feel him lurking behind it. Afterall who else would be at your room this late at night.
This wasn’t the first time this had happened, Anakin just showing up at your room. Sometimes it was to apologize, sometimes it was because he had a nightmare, sometimes it was because he could sense yours. It didn’t matter really because he knew no matter what he was always welcome here, you made sure of that.
It was why he wasn’t surprised when you opened the door before he could officially make himself known. The two of you looking silently at one another before Anakin wordlessly engulfed you in a hug.
You went willingly, melting into him as he wrapped his arms around you, not even bothering to exit the doorway as the two of you stood there and took a second to appreciate the feeling of being supported by the other person.
“You scared me today” the words were mumbled into your hair.
“It was a risk I had to take” you responded softly into his chest, his arms tightening around you at your words.
“I can’t-“ he cut himself off, readjusting slightly to tuck your head under his chin before he spoke again “I don’t like it when you do that”
“And you think I like it when you do” you responded with a laugh, pulling back slightly to look up at him, Anakin reluctantly letting his grasp of you go as you did so.
“I know I just-“ he sighed “I’m sorry Y/N”
“I know Ani”
Finally a comfortable silence fell over the two of you, a moment passing where neither of you said a thing simply enjoying the moment in each others presence before Anakin broke it “I mean it when I say I trust you just please, promise me you’ll be careful”
You smiled softly up at your friend, extending a pinky out to him “I promise Ani”
He smiled and hooked his pinky with yours, neither of you able in this moment to recognizing your lie for what it was.
-
He almost hadn’t answered.
That was the thought that ruminated in his head for weeks after.
You had called, it wasn’t your normal time to talk, and Anakin had almost ignored it, almost told himself he would call you back later.
Thank the maker he was never good at ignoring you.
Your face came up immediately on his hollow display, picture posed strategically to only show your shoulders and above. And even though a smile graced your lips the second he picked up Anakin could still feel it the moment he saw you. Like a punch to the gut, it suddenly hit him that something was wrong. Something was catastrophically wrong. How had he not sensed it earlier?
“Where are you?”
You had just chuckled weakly in response and any other time Anakin lived for that sound but not now, right now he needed you to answer “there’s nothing getting past you is there Ani”
“You were sent to the outer rim right” Anakin steam rolled ahead, grabbing his cloak already intending to hijack the next available ship. He didn’t care if Mace Windu himself was scheduled to be on it.
“That was two missions ago”
Your words halted him in place, Anakin freezing on the spot as he glared back at you, “Y/N”
“Anakin” Maker how could you tease him like this now? You were always stubborn and he loved that about you but right now was not the time to play with his emotions, not with all this at stake.
“I’ll go ask Obi-wan” he was talking more to himself than you at this point, mind whirling with every possible path forward.
He heard you sigh from the communicator but didn’t pay it too much mind, you could yell at him for it later, he would give anything to hear you yell at him later.
“It’s a direct shot to my abdomen” You sucked in a deep breath, gaze dropping to your torso with a grimace, looking at something Anakin couldn’t see “losing blood like this there’s no way you make it in time”
“You don’t know that” he was arguing back before he could properly process your words, his brain refusing to even allow for that possibility.
“I do Ani” you shot him a sad smile, bleeding out, in who knows where and still you were comforting him.
“No there’s got to be someone nearby, another jedi, a local, someone who can help” He was shaking his head, brain desperately clinging to any solution it could.
“I didn’t call you so you could try and solve my problems”
“So why did you call me then?” He knew he wasn’t mad at you, he knew you would know that to, but still he cringed at the way it slipped out, at the way you shoulders slumped slightly at his words.
“Do I ever need a reason to talk to you?”
And he realized then this was you asking for the only help he could give. He was planets away with no ability to reach you and you were asking not to be alone at the end. And even though it killed him he could never say no to you.
“Of course you don’t Y/N”
You smiled at that. A real smile, no undercurrent of pain or pity. Anakin found himself trying desperately to commit to the sight to memory.
“Remember when the council separated us because they thought we had formed an attachment?” You asked softly, head resting back against the wall behind you, your entire body rising and falling with each labored breath.
“Right now it’s hard to forget” he bit down the resentment, it wasn’t what you deserved.
Still you chuckled at him, wincing slightly as you did so “I think right now I have to admit they were onto something”
“I thought that was obvious when I tried to put the entire republic army at risk so that you would be safe”
A teasing roll of your eyes, a fond chuckle “shut up stupid I’m trying to have a moment here”
“I’m sorry please go ahead with your moment” a part of him resented how easy the banter came now, how easy it always came with you, it wasn’t fair.
“You’re my person Anakin” you practically whispered the words, Anakin’s heart swelling painfully in his chest at them “At the end of the day I will always choose you and for the first time I’m not going to condemn myself for thinking it”
“You picked a hell of a time for that revelation sweetheart” the pet name came naturally, he nearly choked on it as it fell from his lips.
You laughed in response, shifting positions with a grunt “Master Kloon did always tell me I needed to work on my timing”
Anakin chimed in before a silence could fully settle over the two of you, “Though I’m sure it’s obvious I will always choose you too Y/N” he took a small amount of pride in the soft smile that grew on your lips at his words.
“So what do you say after the war we leave the order?” You propositioned with a cheesy grin “You and me Skywalker”
It hurt how easily the answer came to him “where would we go?”
“I’ve always liked Naboo” How quickly your answer came made him wonder if like him this wasn’t the first time you had considered this exact scenario.
“I could get a job working on speeders” He proposed with a sad smile.
“I think I’d work at a cantina” you mused back “always thought it would be fun to get to meet people from all over the galaxy”
“It would be a good life” he could feel the truth of those words in his very bones.
A comfortable silence fell over the two of you, both lost in thoughts of what if, before you broke it “Thank you Ani”
“Don’t thank me” he protested weakly “not for this”
“Then for everything else”
Another short silence, a quiet plea slipping unbidden from Anakin “please don’t” he knew where you were going next.
“I have to” you answered softly, solemnly “I think it’s time to say goodbye”
“You don’t have to hang up” he protested “not yet”
“I don’t want you to see me like that” And again he was never one to refuse you anything, a final request he couldn’t say no to. “I love you Ani”
Maker how could hearing those words somehow hurt worse than not hearing them ever did.
“I love you Y/N”
A single tear slipped down your cheek and then you were gone. The newfound silence of the room suffocating him as the emptiness in his chest leached out to fill the space in the room around him.
-
The republic has fallen.
The jedi are no more.
The empire reigns in its place.
Anakin Skywalker is dead.
There was a lot you were told upon waking up from your medically induced coma that was hard to believe. A lot of news that was broken to you that was difficult to swallow. The fact that your entire life fell apart in the mere two weeks you were in a bacta tank was something you weren’t sure you were ever going to be able to come to terms with.
Being with the rebellion helped, to know that despite everything there was still a group of people out there who were willing to put everything on the line for what was right. To a certain extent it felt like being home. It helped you learn to come to terms with those four impossible facts.
So now how were you supposed to deal with learning that one of those facts was actually a lie.
You had seen the trepidation on their faces when you walked into the room, the way the entire groups focus was on you the second you stepped in, it almost felt like being back before the council, you would’ve laughed if they hadn’t seemed so somber.
Now you understand why.
As soon as the words left Mon Mothma’s mouth you felt the ground buckle beneath your feet, felt the world around you start to drown out, felt your legs threaten to give out from beneath you.
You would’ve given anything to hear those words just weeks ago, would’ve wept at the thought of being where you were now, but to hear them so shortly after you had tried to heal the wound was nothing but another devastating blow.
“You told me he was dead”
The group shared nervous looks and your every doubt about the rebellion came rushing to the surface. They were no different than the council at it’s worst, wiling to do anything to separate the two of you, willing to lie to make sure you stayed under their thumb, willing to keep things from you because they believed they knew better. Why did it always feel like you were working for the wrong side?
“We believed he was”
“Bullshit” the word slipped from your lips before your gaze could even meet the speaker’s, anger flaring from your chest at the words “a fact like that, as large of that, there had to be rumors, you had to have guessed”
“We didn’t want to get your hopes up”
A bitter laugh rose to the surface, hands coming to your hair in exasperation “I was told the very republic I gave my life for had fallen, that the very group I was fighting against are now in control, and everyone I had ever known dead at the very hands of the people I had sworn to lead and you didn’t think I could’ve used a little hope?”
“We thought-“
“That wasn’t your decision to make” you countered before they could finish, eyes daring the group to say something “maker how can you not see that it was this very hubris that led to the fall of the jedi? Of the republic? Just because you think you know better-“
“He goes by Darth Vader” a new voice jumped in, your eyes snapping to the holo-projection of Bail Organa, the senator’s eyes giving nothing away but pity.
“no-“ the protest fizzled on your lips, barely enough breath behind it to properly get it out.
“The source is solid” it was Mon Mothma again, eyes practically begging you to listen. “Anakin Skywalker is Darth Vader”
And for a second your brain couldn’t comprehend it, wouldn’t comprehend it. How were you supposed to reconcile these two opposite people as one? “No that doesn’t make any sense”
“I’m sorry Y/N”
“No” you protested loudly, as if yelling could get it to not be true, could get them to admit they were lying, this this was all some sick joke “Someone is wrong, someone is lying to you-“
“The information is good” another voice interrupted but you were too caught up in your spiraling thoughts to even identify who it was.
“No the Anakin Skywalker I knew wouldn’t-“
“The Anakin Skywalker you knew died the day that you did” Senator Organa cut through all the noise in your head, his voice loud but not unkind as he drew your attention, the entire world seeming to fall deathly silent after those words.
“What does that mean” your voice was quiet, broken, you didn’t have it in you to care.
“It was an open secret” he explained softly, the senator façade breaking just slightly “the day you were reported to have died Anakin fought with the Jedi council, fought with Obi-wan, no one could get him to calm down, to think rationally. Eventually he made his way to Palpatine’s office, he hasn’t been seen since”
“We all knew of his distaste for the council before this” Mon Mothma chimed in “he blamed them for your death, drove him right into the arms of the current emperor”
Your mind had slowed, had calmed noticeably but still you found yourself dancing around the issue rather than actually dealing with it, your thoughts instead deciding suddenly to stick to something else.
“Why are you telling me this now?” You watched them all carefully, noticing the nervous glances they sent towards one another rather than answer “I wasn’t lying when I said you were just like the former council, preferring to sit on information until it could properly serve your purpose so what’s the purpose this time?”
Again Mon Mothma took the lead, hesitantly speaking up “he’s formed a group with the sole purpose of hunting down and killing any remaining jedi. It’s quite frankly only a matter of time before he finds you”
You furrowed your brow at this “so you’re warning me? Telling me I need to leave the base?” you shook your head slightly, not liking how either of those answers fit before it finally clicked “you want me to stop him”
“We want you to talk to him” Senator Organa corrected you “if there’s anyone who can get through to that man it’s you”
You eyed each of them skeptically, knowing as you were sure they did as well, that this question only truly had one answer “I’ve been told twice in this conversation alone that Anakin Skwalker is dead.” You took a deep breath, bracing yourself on the back of a chair “for all of our sakes I hope that’s not true”
-
Realistically you knew it was true the minute your ship touched down. Even if you weren’t conscious of it at the time you could feel that all too familiar force signature coming from the planet, seeping into your very bones.
To know it logically was an entirely different story.
You stayed hidden, following from alleyways and rooftops, you couldn’t make out the man beneath the costume but everything about him was just wrong. His gait was wrong, the way he held himself was wrong, the red saber at his hip was wrong, there was no possible way the man beneath the mask was that familiar jedi. And yet…
You couldn’t face him. You knew that. Even if it was Anakin under there you weren’t ready to find out, weren’t sure which answer would be more devastating to you.
So even though it meant failure you put your hood on and slunk away, leaving behind Darth Vader whoever he was, ready to tell the rebellion they would have to come up with another way.
You got little more than a flutter of a cape in warning before he descended upon you.
The black figure whipped around the corner faster than your brain could comprehend, having time to do little more than simply freeze in place before you were lifted off the ground by a force you were all too familiar with, invisible fingers tightening around your neck as you were lifted.
“You’ve been following-“ you got little of the figures voice through the mask before he suddenly cut himself off, the pressure on your neck easing just enough to allow you to gasp for breath, the world stilling around you as you looked out from under your hood at what was supposedly Anakin Skywalker.
The world stood at a standstill for a moment, you hovering inches above the ground, toes desperately seeking purchase, Darth Vader silently staring at you, hand held before him almost trembling. You were working yourself up to croaking out a question when his other hand raised suddenly and with a flick of his wrist your hood went flying back.
The second the light hit your eyes the force on your neck disappeared and you crumbled to the ground below in a heap.
Precious few seconds were given for you to gulp down breath before you were hauled back up by your neck again, this time an actual hand secured firmly around it as you were all but thrown against the wall, your head smacking against the brick painfully.
“who are you” even through the voice modulation you could hear the way he seethed beneath the helmet, ire barely contained by the black material.
“Y/N” you croaked weakly, clawing half-heartedly at the hand around your neck that held you in place.
His fingers tightened in response before he pulled you back and slammed your head once again against the wall, a soft groan escaping you at the impact “now is not the time for games now who are you”
“I’m telling the truth” you practically begged, unable to feel any shame in it as the edges of your vision started to black from lack of air.
“That’s impossible-“ you couldn’t really bring yourself to listen to the rest of the sentence, the only thing running through your mind was a grim acceptance that this was how you would die. Supposedly at the hands of the man you had once loved.
“Ani please”
And you hadn’t meant for the plea to escape you, barely even registered that the nickname passed through your lips. All you could focus on was the fact that after they came out into the open you had finally been released.
Again you crashed to the ground, hands splayed out to catch yourself before you could faceplant, lungs burning as you greedily gulped down air.
“Why would you-“ The words died in his throat and a strange, bitter part of you wanted to laugh.
Once you finally had better control of your breathing you sat back on your heels and looked up at the man clad in black before you, squinting slightly at the sun over his shoulder. “It’s true then”
He didn’t respond, simply looked down at you.
“take off your helmet”
“who do you think you are-“ again the urge to laugh surfaced, the way he reached for anger so readily was so similar to the man you once knew, how could you not have seen it earlier.
“Take off the helmet” He physically recoiled at the command. You softened your voice in response, practically pleading with him "I need to see your face"
Again the man before you went rigid, a tense few seconds passing in silence before he hesitantly reached up and pulled off the helmet.
The man standing before you looked somehow older than you remembered but unmistakably him, and every thought about your mission flew out the window the second his eyes made contact with your own. Your brain rejected the similarities outright, because despite being told Darth Vader and Anakin Skywalker were one in the same you still couldn’t handle this physical evidence linking the two.
You reacted without thinking, taking a single step forward and planting your hands on his chest, roughly shoving him backwards, Anakin allowing himself to be moved without a second thought “Maker Ani what the fuck were you thinking”
His helmet slipped from his grasp absentmindedly, his hand coming up to clutch at his chest where your hands had just been as he just stared at you, eyes swirling with too many emotions for you to pin down at the moment.
“Palpetine are you serious?” You demanded more than asked, hurling the implication at him with reckless abandon “I always told you I didn’t trust him and still you-“
“You weren’t there” he cut you off and his voice was so soft, so broken it startled you into silence, your body physically recoiling back a step as he spoke “You weren’t there, and he was all I had”
“You had Obi-wan, you had Rex, you had people who cared about you Ani”
“They weren’t you” his answer back came steadfast and resolutely, leaving no room for argument, followed by a much quieter, more broken statement “they took you from me”
“No one but that weapons dealer took me from you.”
“They did” neither of you felt the need to define the ‘they’ to which you both referred “If they hadn’t kept me from going with you I could’ve-“
“You don’t know that” you cut him off, this argument feeling much to familiar “Even if you had been there we don’t know-“
“If I had been there then you wouldn’t have-“ and he didn’t need to finish his sentence, the natural end to it evidence that this was an argument he has already had with himself too many times before.
“I didn’t” you begged him to listen to you, “I’m okay. Ani I’m right here”
Your words seemed to shock him out of his own personal bubble, his eyes darting frantically around him before he seized you by the wrist suddenly, surprising you, as he started to pull you further down the alley “you need to go Y/N”
“What” the question left you on an exhale, his sudden change in attitude giving you whiplash as he tried to pull you behind him.
“You can’t be here you need to-“ he whispered quickly, frantically, almost as if the words weren’t for you.
You pulled back on your arm forcing him to stop “Ani I’m not leaving you”
He furrowed his brow at your declaration, a hand on your shoulder trying to nudge you forward still “Y/N do you know what the empire will do to you if-“
“I don’t care” you declared back, halting his movements once again, using his grip on your arm to pull his attention back down to you “I already lost you once, don’t make me do it again”
His eyes bounced desperately back and forth between yours as he set his jaw, you could practically see a million different arguments running through his head.
“Halt” a new voice broke through the tense silence, Anakin’s gaze flickering to its source above your head. You barely had time to gaze over your shoulder at the trio of clone troopers that had approached, guns drawn, before Anakin had sent the lead one flying rapidly into the wall with a flick of his wrist.
You tried desperately to hide your flinch at the noise of his armer hitting the building.
The other two froze on the spot, blasters still pointed at you, but Anakin ignored them both, hand still held aloft as he stared down at you debating his next steps for a precious few moments before he spoke.
You could see him physically morph as he addressed the clone troopers, could see him become that other man, that Darth, in the way he squared his shoulders and straightened his back, the way his voice dropped an octave, the way his grip on your wrist grew almost painful as his gaze bore down into yours
“this one is force sensitive, she comes with me”
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jihyoruri · 27 days ago
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❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ ❚ 𓍢 CAUGHT IN BETWEEN kim chaewon & huh yunjin
prev. masterlist . next
★ ͘ ⴰ NEW MAGIC WAND kim chaewon x reader
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“don’t call me selfish I ain’t sharing.” - tyler the creator
there was a lot of things yunjin was feeling after the words chaewon said to her in the car, they just kept playing in her head.
“are really stupid enough to think that you and yn have something? I’m embarrassed for you.”
“do you really wanna play this game right now?”
“you may like yn, but your like for her will never amount to mine, you’ve had your fun but it’s time to back off.”
she’s never seen chaewon so serious before, she understands liking yn, she likes yn a lot, but the way chaewon was looking at her seems like this whole thing was beyond just like.
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the first time chaewon ever laid her eyes on yn was them being filmed on tv to go against each other to be in a girl group.
she was hypnotized.
yn was gorgeous.
and chaewon will probably fight you if you say it out loud, but that’s the main reason why she got votes, she was like a real life barbie.
that didn’t mean she wasn’t talented, yn was insanely talented, but there was just something about her look that drew people in.
and she definitely had drawn chaewon in.
chaewon doesn’t remember a time where didn’t like yn. all she remembers is standing next to the girl with a bright smile on her face now being in a group called iz*one.
if you were to ask chaewon what was the best moment in her like, she would definitely say that one.
iz*one was magical for her.
yn kept her calm and balanced, if yn was around that meant everything was gonna be okay in chaewon’s eyes.
yn and her were inseparable, at the airport they were together, in group lives they were at right beside each other, at award shows with their arms linked, solo lives together with just them.
the fans loved it, chaewon loved it.
most idols don’t like being shipped with their members but chaewon loved how much yn and her were shipped together and yn didn’t seem to have a problem with it either.
when chaewon asked her if it bothered her one night in their shared dorm room, yn replied “why would I? it’s you chaewon.”
and boy did that make chaewon fall even harder, it was her.
anybody with two eyes could see that chaewon was clearly smitten with yn, the way her eyes would soften every time it was yn’s turn to talk or the way she would push herself in between to be beside yn if she was beside another member, she was kind of possessive.
which is why the girls in iz*one always let yn and chaewon be yn and chaewon, they never got in the way and everything was good.
which is why iz*one disbanding was the worst moment of chaewon’s life.
all she remembers is her wrapping her arms around yn while the girl hugged her tight bawling her eyes out, everything was changing, what if yn didn’t want to be an idol anymore like minju? what if they go their separate ways and they only saw each other on certain days of the year?
she couldn’t let that happen.
she wouldn’t let that happen.
and it almost did.
“I don’t know…” yn trailed off looking at a pleading chaewon who looked like she was about to burst out into tears.
“I have a lot of modeling agencies calling me and I was thinking-”
“NO.”
yn’s eyes opened wide at chaewon’s outburst, “chae-”
“just think of it yn, us on stage again and with sakura unnie it will be so much fun, your fans are hoping that you’ll return to the stage, they love you.” chaewon says grabbing both of yn’s hands, “I really want to be in a group with you again, I can’t imagine being in one without you.”
“alright…only because I love you.”
chaewon’s heart swelled at that, she was so excited, she’d be back on stage with yn again and everything will be back to how it was.
oh how she was so wrong.
she clenched her jaw watching yunjin chat it up with yn who was just happy to see a fellow person from produce.
“you’re so pretty.” yunjin said smiling brightly at yn, who returned the smile, “I’m gonna start calling you pretty girl.”
“I’ve never been called that before.” yn replie her eyes softening at the compliment.
“well now you have, pretty girl.”
chaewon could’ve screamed right then and there, yunjin’s flirting was unbearable, who did she think she was?
and what bothered her evern more was the fact that yunjin wasn’t gonna back down she could feel it.
but if there’s one thing she knew.
she wouldn’t lose.
not to someone who doesn’t understand yn the way she does, not to someone who doesn’t need yn like the way she does.
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chaewon knocked gently against yn’s bed room door, she felt relaxed after the things she said to yunjin, she tried her best to stay calm, but she just couldn’t, not when it seemed like the girl couldn’t get it through her thick skull that whatever her and yn have going on doesn’t exist.
“come in!”
chaewon walked into the room, her eyes scanning the room, smiling at the amount of pictures that was just her and yn on yn’s wall.
“hey…” chaewon trailed off walking over to yn’s bed where the girl was laying down, “you looked beautiful today.”
“thank you chae,” yn replied with a big smile before opening her arms causing chaewon to immediately jump into them.
they both laid on the bed in comfortable silence, chaewon stuffed her face in yn’s neck smiling, “I’ve missed you.” she said quietly.
“huh? but I’m always here.”
“yeah, but it doesn’t feel like it sometimes, it’s probably because we’re all so busy but I miss sharing a room with you and it just being us while everything else just existed.”
“it can still be like that,” yn replied back softly, “I haven’t gone anywhere, you can come to my room whenever you want.”
chaewon felt herself melt when yn wrapped her arms tighter around her, she loved how natural it felt, this was exactly how it should be, just like how it was in iz*one.
“wanna go shopping with me tomorrow?” yn asked, chaewon could tell there was a giddy smile on her face.
“of course, can I sleep in here tonight?”
“of course.”
“hey yn- wanna-?”
yunjin pauses mid sentence at the sight in front of her, her breath hitching when she sees chaewon lift her head from yn’s neck to look at who’s at the door.
“yeah?” yn asked.
yunjin stares at chaewon who looks back at her with intensity, it was like she was saying I told you with her eyes.
“uh never mind, I’m actually gonna just ask sakura unnie.”
“okay, close the door I don’t want the light messing with my pink leds.”
“alright .” yunjin said about to close the door before looking back at chaewon who had a faux smile on her face.
“night yunjin.”
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